My down attitude from my Lovey being away so much is making an undesirable impact on my grandkids. Last night while putting Arulai to bed, she told me that when she gets her purse, she’d like to give me the money she’s saved to help out so Papa wouldn’t have to be gone so much. This morning, Titus melted into a puddle on the ground as Papa was saying his goodbyes because there was no one to help build his Monster Jam track. (Selah is generally alright as long as she has Nonnie or Mommy.)
While talking to Arulai last night, I realized I was fostering discontentment in my grands (and in myself!). I began telling her that not only was the Lord using Papa’s job to provide for our family; the Lord is also doing other work in Papa’s heart, in my heart, even in their hearts. It’s not only about the money. It’s about trusting God. It’s about following His way joyfully. It’s about God working in the lives of His children, so that we can shine forth His beauty to others.
I had been saying some good words to the kids, to the public at large, but I hadn’t been receiving this whole work/travel related package as a love-gift from the Father. And my grands could see that!
Wanna know some benefits of this job? Besides the provision we’ve received, that is! One of the greatest benefits I’ve seen is my husband’s confidence returning. After the layoff almost 5 years ago, Bill has struggled in this area. He is more often lifting ME up nowadays than vice versa, as it had been for a good while! He is traveling, which he loves. He is coming across all different kinds of people, situations, climates, traffic laws…and handling every one with confidence (even when he doesn’t like it!). That is a huge blessing from the Lord – a gift to my sweet hubby.
Another benefit is for me. Now that Bill is gone quite a bit, and since being oft alone isn’t very easy for me, Nathanael and Emily have given me a bit of purpose in my weeks. I have the opportunity to be with them in their home every Wednesday – Thursday; a sleepover, the kids call it! I have loved being a part of their family IN THEIR HOME – seeing how they do life together! Officially, I have a “job.” Mostly, I’m just Nonnie with a schedule! But this has been a blessing to me, and is slowly building back some of the confidence I’ve lost as a natural result of the “empty nest.”
There is also a hidden benefit in being away from the one I love most on this earth, in that I am forced to turn to the One who loves me most through time and eternity. The Lord God never leaves me nor forsakes me. He is ever there to hear my prayers, encourage me through His Word, and provide for my every need while my Lovey is away. I also believe He is doing the same for my Lovey! These sacrifices of joy we are giving now are becoming joy overflowing!
I have asked the Lord to grow me spiritually this year – that I won’t be stagnant, but will actually be able to SEE the work being done by my Heavenly Father. He is answering that prayer, and giving me eyes to see. The burning of the dross is painful – sometimes the pain is a 2, and sometimes it’s a full 10! I pray I will not allow circumstances and feelings to blind me to God’s work in me and in my family. Thank you, Lord, for continuing to complete the work you began in me almost 50 years ago!
God bless your day!